John McCain, Have the Decency to Look Someone in the Eye When He is Talking to You.

I thought John McCain did a good job at debating tonight. I sat in the car in the Fred Meyer parking lot and listened to the entire debate on the radio, before I went in and bought my groceries. As I turned off the radio, I thought, Both of these candidates are good, qualified men. I wish they did not come with their parties, or I might even vote for one of them.

I came home and fixed dinner and watched the debate on television, twice. Half-way through the second viewing, it struck me. I did not see John McCain once have the decency to turn his head and look Obama in the eye. For the rest of the debate I watched intently to see whether McCain would pay Obama the respect of human eye contact. All the while, Obama looked regularly at McCain and spoke to McCain directly. McCain so steadfastly did not turn to look at Obama that I can conclude only that McCain refused to look at him. That must have taken some force of will to avoid looking at a man who was speaking to him. That must have taken quite the disrespect.

I have been in situations on occasion when someone has refused to pay me the dignity of eye contact, and I know how it made me feel. It was demeaning and told me that the person to whom I was speaking had no respect for me as a person. It hurt me and felt insulting.

I watched and saw Obama regularly pay John McCain the respect of eye contact throughout the debate, without acknowledgement in return. Obama did not get angry or grow frustrated at the insult of McCain's persistent avoidance. McCain did not once speak to Obama directly, while Obama regularly spoke directly to McCain, as the moderator had requested.

I can tell you this: This behavior by McCain caused me to see him differently than I had ever seen him before. I have respected McCain for many things. And I still do respect him for some things. But I lost a great deal of respect for him tonight. He did a great job at debating substance, but he failed in being a respectful human being. That says a lot to me about how he would deal with people as the President of the United States. And in my book, his persistent refusal to pay the simplest gesture of respect tells me all I need to know about his qualifications be a next door neighbor, let alone the President of the United States.

Sorry, Senator McCain. What you, Sir, don't understand, you could learn from the man whose respect you refused to acknowledge tonight. He looked at you, he called you by name, he spoke respectfully to you. But you refused to look at him. When he becomes President, Senator, watch and learn.